Time to Find Another Apocalypse

Oh, hellz yeah.

Guy I’ve idly fancied since middle school liked my photo on facebook. FUCK YEA.

"Why I Will Never Have A Girlfriend" AKA A gender-switched version of my life

I would give my soul to have someone serenade me with this song. 

“You’re an artist; I’m a silly jerk.” <- This line describes my life. I’m an artist. Who likes assholes (the people, not the slang term for a particular bit of human anatomy). Sort of. Not in a masochistic way, though. 

What will you name the multiple babies you were impregnated with when you first saw this image?

This is Rose of Sharon from Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath. She’s about to (pick one) a)Be left by her sissy of a husband, b)Be convinced she’s a sinner by a crazy bitch, c)Breastfeed a grown man after her ill-fated baby dies. This fate could have been avoided if she had a sassy gay friend. 

Yeah. I have too much free time. Because I do this for just about everything ever. Like, the full dialogue and all of that. My Oedipus one is pretty pro.

Man, I feel like there’s about a million that describe my life, just based on what I’ve seen. But I don’t want to make any cos I’m lazy like that. Is there a GIF database?

Tumblr, Y I NO UNDERSTAND YOU???

I’d have a vast number of celebrities (most British, most between the ages of 30 and 45) casually stalking me on the internet.

Many boys I don’t like would become hetero-curious for me.

Those on the internet and the real world would envy me for my social life. 

All of my friends would be jealous of my GPA, and I would be the hardest-working of all of them.

My incredible number of boyfriends would all be jealous of each other. 

I would have both a wealth of talents and an awesomely fun life. 

Yeah. That’s what’s up.